The Star Diaries by Stanislaw Lem

The Star Diaries: Further Reminiscences of Ijon Tichy by Stanisław Lem
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Whimsical, quirky stories set in ridiculous and alien scenarios – just like Gulliver’s travels but on a galactic scale, with a generous dose of absurd alien neologisms in the vein of Lewis Carroll or Anthony Burgess, achieving Joycean levels

the enigmatic monsters were known under the following names: prucks, borkers,nuffits, gnuttles, garrugulas, malomorps, zops, yots, yuts, batats, rifflers, thycandorines, closh, flibbage and morchmell.

In the General Assembly of United Planets, here is how the utterly insignificant humans (Monstroteratum Furiosum aka the Stinking Meemy) stand in the Galactic scheme of things

In accordance with the accepted systems of taxonomy and nomenclature, all anomalous forms found in our Galaxy are contained within the phylum Abberentia (Deviates, Freaks), which is divided into the subphyla Debilitales (Boobs) and Antisapientinales (Screwheads). To the latter subphylum belong the classes Canaliacaea (Thuglies) and Necroludentia (Corpselovers). Among the Corpselovers we distinguish, in turn, the orders Particidiaceae (Fatherbeaters), Matriphagideae (Mothereaters) and Lasciviaceae (Abominites, or Scumberbutts. The Abominites, highly degenerate forms, we divide into Cretininae (Clenchpoops viz. Cadaverium Mordans or the Chewcarcass Addlepate) and Horrorsrissimae (Howlmouths, with the classic example of the Outchested Backshouldered Dullard, Idiontus Erectus Gzeemsi). A few of the Howlmouths have actually been known to create their own pseudo-cultures; among these are the species as Anophilus Belligerens, the Bungford Tuff, which calls itself Genius Pulcherrimus Mundanus, or that most curious specimen, possessing an entirely bald body and observed by Grammpluss in the darkest corner of our Galaxy - Monstroteratum Furiosum (the Stinking Meemy), which has given itself the name of Homo Sapiens… the separate order Degeneratores, to which belonged the Fouljowls, Upgluts, Necrovores and Stifflickers: the application of the term ‘Monstroteratus’ to humans, was incorrect – instead one should follow the nomenclature of the Aquarian School, employing the more consistent term of Bug-eyed Bogus (Artefactum Abhorrens)

This is the ignominious origin of life on Earth

…these miscreants then emptied on the rocks of lifeless Earth six barrels of gelatinous glue, rancid, plus two cans of albuminous paste, spoiled, and that to this ooze they added some curdled ribose, pentose and levulose, and – as that filth was not enough – they poured upon it three large jugs of a mildewed solution of amino acids, then stirred the seething swill with a coal shovel twisted to the left… wilfully and knowingly sneeze into that protoplasmal matter, and, infected it thereby with the most virulent viruses, guffawed that he had thus breathed “the fucking breath of life” into those miserable evolutionary beginnings.

Here is a description of the inhabitants of the planet Enteropia

…dominant race – the Ardrites, intelligent beings, polydiaphanohedral, nonbisymmetrical and pelissobrachial, belongling to the genus Siliconoidea, order Polytheria, class Luminifera. Like all Polytheria the Artrites are subject to periodic discretional splitting. They form families of the spherical type … Fauna of the siliconoidal var., prin. species: slebs, autochial, dendernifts, gruncheons, squamp and whispering octopockles. Aquatic fauns: constitute the raw material of the food industry. Prin. species: infernalia (hellwinders), chungheads, frinkuses and opthropularies. Unique to Enteropia is the torg, with its bollical fauna and flora. In our Galaxy that only thing analogous to it are the hii in the frothless sump bosks of Jupiter

Alas! At times it does tend to get tiresome and repetitious.

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